2/11/19-Mon.-This journal was begun about 47 years ago. At the time, I felt interested in life and that I had worthwhile things to write. Along the way, there seems to have been less of that sense of excitement or expectation. Nearly half a century later, it is evident my options are limited. I had a minor stroke last month. Numerous acquaintances are experiencing significant loss. It is more obvious that of course everyone is mortal. My then 38-year-old brother, Ralph, died in 1990 of a brain tumor. At 96, my mother passed on last year of infection, a major fall, heart problems, bronchitis, and alcohol abuse. Dad lived 83 years. Global warming threatens our collective futures. A friend's 18-year-old, his only child, was murdered a couple weeks ago. Entomologists note an alarming decline in insect numbers over the past few decades. The political scene is now the opposite of progressive. Yet the story is surely not only about what is being taken away. As a volunteer at an elementary school, I help out in a cool library and am coaching a budding chess club. Spring is only a few weeks away, and the groundhog assures us it will come early this year. 2/14/19-Thurs.-Valentine's Day-On Tuesday I visited an acquaintance in hospital struggling with major heart problems, fluid retention, and the after-effects of throat cancer and treatments for it. He has so much trouble breathing he requires regular nebulizer therapy. His lower extremities are swollen to at least half again their normal girth. Incontinence too is a factor in his distress. I feel badly for him and what he is enduring. This fellow is several years younger than me, yet it is evident my own prospects could be similarly reduced at any moment. Yesterday, though, Jan and I appreciated a pre-holiday buffet meal at a favorite restaurant. Today we exchanged Valentine's mementos and sentiments. At the school library where I volunteer there were as well celebratory moments in recognition of the special day. Janice's and my dog, Puff, is still a source of joy and doing fairly well at over 15 years' young. There is, indeed, much for which to feel glad, and no need to dwell on an uncertain future.

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