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May, 2012: 14 17 18 20 21 22

5/14/12-Mon.-A hectic weekend has just ended. Drove up to Waco on Friday for a visit with Mom. Early the following day, I drove us up to Arlington where we met Horace and his family plus several other guests of his second daughter, Virginia, for her graduation from the University of Texas there.

5/17/12-Thurs.-On the road again. Have stopped for a break in Lampasas, TX, while heading to Brownwood for a Man-to-Man Alanon/A.A. Conference that begins tomorrow. Lampasas is roughly one-third the distance from Austin to my destination. I am taking the trip easily, no rush.

On the way, have been thinking about concise wisdom of a meditation path. I am no guru (!) but have learned a few things since began meditating 42 years ago. I may write some of the insights down for quick reference.

I could if I wished similarly encapsulate nuggets about both dream interpretation and investing. Such summaries may not be of interest to others, yet could be rewarding for me to periodically review.

5/18/12-Fri.-Up a little past 8 A.M. after enjoying a late evening of reading, e-mails, TV, exercise, and meditation last night.

Almost none of the negative feelings we have, such as anger, resentment, sadness, shame, fear, or guilt, are about anything happening outside ourselves. Virtually all are responses to our own over-reactive patterns, learned in childhood and reinforced since. First, we can become aware of the physical contractions responsible for these feelings. They can then gradually lose their power over us.

Regarding Fran's and my investments, in so far as is practicable, I should avoid tallying up our net asset value beyond the year-end analyses. Such tallies invite anxiety about paper losses. Rather, I should simply sell on rallies, buy on dips, assure total equity book value increases 13.5% a year, and maintain an equity total dividend of 2% or better the book value amount, with most high dividend assets held in tax-deferred accounts as long as practicable.

5/20/12-Sun.-It has not been an easy time for me, this Man-to-Man Conference. At times it has seemed a mistake to have come here. Yet I have learned a lot, the speeches have been excellent, and my fellowship with old hands in my Austin men's Alanon group has been enhanced.

Later. Am on the way home. The speaker this morning was again fabulous, though in a very different way than the man who spoke last night.

5/21/12-Mon.-A feeling of ease, peace, or comfort is not a necessity; nor is it required for joy. And we do not deserve it from anyone else.

Since the mind cannot be focused on two things at once, if a person dwells in the present instant on whatever comes into awareness, noting it and letting it go, he or she may develop deep insight into the nature of reality without obsessing on the productions of a strictly negative imagination, that masquerade as either our past or (our worst fears about) the future.

5/22/12-Tues.-Feelings, especially negative ones, can seem overwhelming, even unbearable. Yet they can be borne, and we need to avoid giving in to them as motivators of either actions or reactions. We can, instead, engage in vigorous play, productive exercise, humor, or journaling, or we might talk with a trusted friend, speak with a sponsor, focus on a quality pastime, do necessary chores, and/or enjoy concentrated meditation.


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