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July, 2018
8 24 27 30I am younger. So is my sister, Alice, as is our dad. I am still living at home with them, though the house is smaller than either the 10-W Spread or the Wild-W Hollow that we'd been in later. We are in a section of the house without window exits, and there is only one door entrance/exit. Something is severely wrong with Dad. He has a big ax and is killing with it. I think he has already killed each of two of our brothers plus our mom, completing the chore for each victim with one or at most two blows. I don't know if there are any other brothers, but if so they are not around. While doing this slaughter, Dad is right outside the one door, and now is banging away at the wooden structures of the house or door. Alice and I have a weak barricade against his getting in, but it will not last long under this onslaught. This is before cell phones, and the regular phone does not work. We cannot call anyone for help. Probably he has already cut the cord. I am trying to enlist Alice's help to find a way to keep him out and/or to get some weapon to use if he comes in, but the prospect of either is not looking good (when I wake up).
7/24/18 - Title: "Ego In Trouble"
I am a newly hired disability examiner (again), getting used to my new unit and small cubicle. Already it seems, in just my first few hours back on the job, I am behind on initiating cases and have a backlog of rule and regulation updates to review and properly file. I realize coming back here was a mistake and resolve to do the best I can in the next 2-3 months I have ahead in this capacity and then retire for good. Co-workers and a supervisor, none of whom I know yet, seem to all know their roles here and to be carrying them out more or less adequately, in some cases doing so quite proficiently. I feel like a fish out of water. I don't know what for me will follow the ordeal of the next few months here, but it feels as if that interim will be drudgery, a time of feeling like a failure, frustrated, anxious, and depressed.
[Shadows do their jobs pretty well, but the ego is having big challenges and feeling uncomfortable. 2-3 suggests this is about dawning awareness plus transformation. A "fish out of water" suggests one problem for the ego is he is not in touch with his unconscious, intuition, or the scope and depth of his emotions. There is way too much seeing oneself as a victim, not nearly enough accepting things as they are and appreciating that the glass is at least half-full.]
7/27/18 - Title: "Writing Well"
I am at work or in a class with several others one morning, having evidently been in this job or course for awhile. It is early morning, and I am, as usual soon after getting up, having trouble feeling really awake, but at least I'm here. The supervisor or course teacher knows me, of course. He gives us an assignment to do a piece of writing. He's not specified just what sort of writing he wants, so it's pretty open. He tells me he expects me to show my usual brilliance, and I'm not sure if he's serious or kidding but think, yes, in fact at times I have written well on the spur of the moment, especially if I have a chance to edit the piece later, so I start writing, then think maybe I can do better with a typewriter and put an old portable one on a table in front of me and start my hunt-and-peck method to get some ideas down. It feels as though it is "working" for me, that I'm writing something my supervisor or teacher will see as one of the better submissions, something expressing a thought that is personal, genuine, and worth putting across. Another employee or classmate is unsure how to proceed and asks my advice, based on my having been here awhile already. I give him a couple tips.
[The repetition of morning or early morning suggests there may be some initial grieving (mourning) going on, perhaps having to do with my mom's physical and mental decline and her likely death in the next year or so. It is also about growth (work, class, or course). Creative expression is emphasized, something I am fairly good at, so in this dream there is more of a focus on the positive. There is recognition that I have some skill, experience, and information I can pass along to others new to inner realm circumstances like this. Here there is a relationship with a mentor part of me (a teacher or supervisor who thinks highly of my abilities and makes suggestions for how to enhance them). A goal is to be more awake, but there is recognition I am not there yet. A "couple" suggests dawning awareness of the issues involved.]
7/30/18 - Title: "Too Cold"
Scene One - I am with several others on some kind of journey or vacation. We have been in one area for awhile and, when faced with a choice of having another fun day here, like we've had before, kind of a Goldilocks day, not too hot, not too cold, or not, we decide to move on and try something new.
Scene Two - A group of us have arrived at a new place. We're like good specialists, and it seems our talents may come in handy here. However, a bunch of retarded and/or autistic kids and their attendants in this factory built over the sea, with large openings and great access between the sea and the factory superstructure, are here already, well adapted to the factory work and the quirks and risks of the sea and sea life, and we are not. One small step at a time, the entire sequence repeated over and over, the kids can put together or repair complex pieces of machinery that are assembled or fixed here. We befriend them, and they try to tell us the score, like how to make things and be safe while so intimately involved with the sea, but mostly we don't take them seriously. After all, what could they know, just a bunch of special needs children? A bunch of my buddies, men and women, are scuba diving at one of the big access point open spaces, accessible to the sea. Suddenly I sense the kids raising an alarm and that something or things are moving very fast through the water from at least one, but maybe as many as three or four directions, and in an instant my scuba diving friends are gone, replaced by a slowly expanding underwater cloud of their blood. Next, the sea in the factory is higher, sweeping several feet deep from one end to the other of the vast superstructure. The kids and their attendants again seem used to this and hold onto the parts of the superstructure that rise out of this tide-like higher sea. Suddenly big, fast whale-like and shark-like creatures swim in. One heads directly for me. I swing from my handholds on one of the superstructures, so my feet can move fast in the water too, and kick the creature coming to try to eat me in the toothy snout, and he goes away, then circles back. His mouth and many teeth are unlikely to be put off by another of my simple kicks, but I get ready to do the maneuver again as it sweeps in, maybe for the kill (and I wake up).