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9/30/01-Growing pains every second a life death struggle choice intelligent pairings of predator vs. prey both within the complex totem of the psyche arthralgias or bone cancers gastrointestinal disorders or chronic ischemic heart disease etc. raucous spilling over voices of children who've known no after birth trauma vs. the listless silent starvation of young afghan innocents are their offspring of less worth than our own pepper's hairless but for a soft fur-like undercoat that invites the petting that she hates on the white panama city beach with linda beautiful in bathing attire we found a living seahorse still on its bit of sargassa returned it to the waves and an injured laughing gull whole but where one wing attaches a raw red wound through muscle and tendon we rescued it would eat only pieces of bologna drink from a bowl its inappropriate hilarity startling at times of intimacy or angry passion folly of a jealous rage I broke in after she'd gone back with bill the house empty their clothes strewn about the youngsters at school I found a terrapin and gave it to little michael a family of cute gray mice took up housekeeping in the walls of the utility room we wrote wedding vows to exchange bought gifts organized a reception and at the appointed hour all were dressed and in readiness but the justice of the peace never appeared pepper stinks when excited or wet needs a bath has she a soul these aches are they merely of aging or terminal signs symptoms mystery pains...
9/26/01-Jihad steps' sudden thump and faint squeak no light nor sound if hope to live I'll take it at the right price black terror more rapid than old limbs can run large ancient colonial suburb house bearing rifles and curved swords on foot on horse and on camel back comes our end wide streets leaf-strewn autumn yards' vast expanse culling us like wolves the infirm from our modern herd attacking by day by night with distant stealth quiet rooms a mansion make digital bacterial viral chemical conventional nuclear or up close and personal each an enclave of memories enclosing a treasured past stripes stars crosses dollars eagles in god we trust symbols will not protect us beloved tattered stairwell carpets we are not immune the very air we breathe and water we drink bearing our last rites only four hundred thousand you've got a deal friend against friend neighbor against neighbor brother against brother moving settling in across deserts forests plains and urban sprawl yearned for retirement in upstate new york no refuge no sanctuary no hiding dusk clouds the colors of an inner oyster shell the northern night sky filled with shimmering aurora borealis waves like death angel wings from the raging storm...
9/23/01-Last night a dream an exaggerated rendition of an incident yesterday fortunately minor Fran driving I'm a passenger in front we must wait we're only a short distance from our destination and already have been misled and sent out of our way by initially inaccurate directions from others now have only to remain calm and go a little way to set things right but we find ourselves in the midst of strangers with other autos not a forté circumstance for my better half and I'm having one of those sinking feelings knowing with total clarity what needs to be done yet not being in control as Fran succumbs again to temporary insanity space for only one vehicle to park a tight fit she eases into it misjudges and keeps on stop I yell as she guns the engine again I let fly a few ill chosen words as the back wheels go over the edge extreme delicacy is now required to avoid making things worse as we are teetering on the edge of disaster wait I tell her hoping for a return of calm and rational behavior of course inevitably as I watch in disbelief reminiscent of the viewing of the second plane's piercing of the side of the body of christ she guns the engine again the car backs further and we begin to drop slowly at first then more quickly help I yell and people come running I experience one of those hideous slow motion mentations as everything goes wrong Fran begins cursing them no I say don't listen to her please fasten a tow rope on the axle before it's too late Fran rants on berserk causing our rescuers to halt back off help I implore desperate help us before it is too late at length when I offer a large sum a gleam of avarice lighting his face one old enemy sets off at a run for a towing cable as Fran guns it again and we shoot backward losing our hold on the last of our traction teeter briefly on the brink then topple over into the void as rocketing down for the thousandth time with utterly helpless horror I see the twin towers begin to fall...
9/19/01-Infinite justice everyman ritalin tender living grapes nice hypnotic power trip trance just injected folly carbon dioxide in jolly a billion chatting aligned in your sin net fin ice starfish six hundred sixty-six born in world war two striking it from the greatest finish on ulysses one hundred forty-four thousand eschatological times tin bloody finite pin visions just the deaths inhaled joy conjunction of planets start net butchering edge nostradamus new world city will die in world war three last crusades flaming lances piercing knife sky towers we cannot to the least win grok all war nations all climes I knew you yorick when your grin was not so grave injustice infinite folly...
9/10/01-Animal power raging snarling racing leaping biting tearing feline bringing down both beasts and man digging claws into unbalanced leathery flesh torso slashing and snapping vulnerable primate muscle tendon and cervical spine asphyxiating with wide-jawed kiss over nose and mouth dragging new spoils across jungle or plain or snowy slope ripping dividing with others in her pride driving off fierce competitors dream of huge saber-tooth's silent stalking wildness unleashed in human sanctuaries with no warning no escape the poles are melting the cold ocean currents' flow losing salinity and slowing down a new age of ice returning...
9/6/01-Take your rubbers two big coolers stupid by gluttony no respect at home risking diabetes keep the mosquito coast titillating west nile virus papyrus treasures golden by breasts succor honey livers long revisiting old friends imagine it simple fran said as if already dead and floating free the prophet has the feel of a rude earwig lava roller river and points north the solar wind relatives the twins and phallus phil conditionally loving and snuggling together if one could lick the cherry babies nesting bitten in the conjugal bed expanse of radiant orb solitary separate respite gestures of friendship sense and enjoy for their larder its great storms taking for granted up on favorite candy mountain we experience these in you never know menstrual flows lunar neath multiple layers just as now too many sleeping orgasmic by halves warm clothing electromagnetic outermost earthly breezes exquisitely too tidal part to bed later cause and cycle envied in-laws rattlesnake leaving eons of orbital flying apart awaiting annually stocking mushrooms last night by hummingbird in florida the morning for pig tits illinois cooler weather bitter adventurous turbulence early death roundup yet spinning away brilliant the sun's toward the center falling perfectly balanced through the moist parts...
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