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3/24/08-Personal trainer not working out yoga yoga a buxom naked lady central ma good idea market yuppie morning time rituals waiting for the sara connection south city blues pharynx phlegm back strain wondering if I have cancer turned on not ready to see a specialist yet ignorance not really too much butter blissful I used to stutter what's going down austin's cool but it's not by the north pacific sea writing the first all the busy people four hundred this was a good idea pages are as stimulating as the fish depletion hardest by the sink things changing irrevocably missing old friends pastimes puff restless anxious better than espresso alone I want some of that back in the car just after too much butter dawn chill take a chance rhythms not working out in everything watching all the busy people this was a good idea but it's not working out I hope sara is alright watering depression white tulips nursing mother breast sufficiency cold applesauce on the tongue heartbeat green space open mind the solace of deep sleep grief focused practice attention...
3/17/08-Yet another spring is happening lost checks estrangement wind fire flood warnings rude nightmares and risky drivers jim's in houston for a couple or three days despair the natural state each inner realm step bedeviled by the ooze and slide of swampland serpents for our stories never end well yet one instant at a time may we laugh and know the absolute perfection of it all this journey on treacherous ground and our highest soaring flights ultimately precarious for forces far beyond our poor measures of control hold sway each inner realm step bedeviled by the ooze and slide of swampland serpents we've nowhere to run the great debaters trust worth more than gold weight yet another spring is happening trudy's where ralph and I supped in halcyon days when we had the luxury not guessing that one would soon yet another spring is happening be dead of prickly belittling competitive personalities estrangement when we yearned instead to know and convey deep caring more than gold weight friendship respect brotherly love ignorant yet another spring is happening each inner realm step bedeviled by the ooze and slide of swampland serpents of the facts we cannot help each inner realm step bedeviled by the ooze and slide of swampland serpents but make real whoppers of mistakes estrangement birds in flight raucous or musical calls and solo or flock behaviors mirror and recall their dinosaur ancestries fran's final fiftieth gift today dancin' his life away I'm a generalist but she more than gold weight excels at specialization and already can be yet another spring is happening best the supposed experts in her selected fields for fun siren scream there is always less time than we want with all our doing our dead lines have we a spare moment or two for joy and the means first through grieving each inner realm more than gold weight step estrangement bedeviled by the ooze and slide of swampland serpents giving up all hope to find it estrangement yet another spring is happening...
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